Why naming your cat is irrelevant.

Kitty eyes see all.

I’m pretty sure that not a single one of my cats has ever come out of their mother’s womb, been named something, and kept that name throughout their entire life.

Furthermore, once a cat name IS officially chosen and is permanent enough to be the one on file at he vet’s (although I have one that goes under a different name and one we had to change at the vet, read on), it is very rare that when talking to the cat, the cat is actually referred to as that particular name.

Shadow –> Baby
Ernie –> Chaos –> Fatty a.k.a. “Big Guy” at the vet, my mother refuses to let his official vet name be Fatty. In fact, she refuses to even call him Fatty.
Original name forgotten –> Mikey –> Little
Gus –> Jager
Oz –> Porkchop –> Moosh Moosh
Fernando –> Taco

Now, all of these names are used here and there, but most of the time either generic baby-talk names are instead or variations of the name. My favorites include Boo Bear, Boo Boo, Babycakes, Kittania, Snuggleface, Poopbutt, Bunny, Stinkers, Stinko, Fatboy or STOP IT NOW.

Moosh Moosh in all his glory.

Moosh Moosh, on any given day, could be Moosh Mash, MooshyMooshyMooshy, Mooshito, Mooshcakes, Mooshface, Skooshers, Skooshy, or  MoshiMoshi. When we got him, we really thought he was a good Porkchop until he smooshed our faces so much that Moosh Moosh just stuck.

Fatty? Well, that’s easy. Fat Fatty McFatterson, FattyCakes, Fatty Lumpkins, Fattilicious, Fatbaby.

JagerJagger, Woogie, Jagermeister or Cougar.

Taco, by far, has the most, I guess it’s just the easiest to mess around with — Taquito, Yablito, Tikki-Taco, Tablo, Cobblers, Jocko, Yacko, Taquerita, Toblerone, Yablo, Chimichanga, Blobblo or Taco-san.

And yes, I do speak to my cats in baby talk. Wanna make something of it?

Moosh Moosh ain’t havin’ any of it.

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3 comments

  1. Phwoffy

    I love this.
    I can count the amount of times a year I call my boy Gizmo on two fingers. He’s Giz, of course, G-Whizz, Mobius G, Tabby McCat, Tabby Stripes, Catticus Mo… Gizmo? No, never. Even the hamsters have suffered the same fate. We have a Barney who is simply McChubber (or Barney B. Trouble), a Felix who I only ever call Chi and an Oscar who’s just Little O. I don’t think I even call the boyfriend by his proper name anymore.

    I can only imagine we give them names that other people could pronounce so that we don’t sit in the vets and wait for “Gizzy-bo Catticus Stripe Face Green” to be read out!

    • MEOWhearthis

      Hahaha I would love to hear that, though! There’s a vet office by me that puts up the “pet of the month” names on their sign and I usually scoff at the boringness of them.

      And yeah, the only time I call my boyfriend by his actual name is when I’m mad at him. Same with the cats, now that I think about it.

      Thanks for reading!

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