I wake up to go to work earlier than a lot of people, 5:30ish. I’m not that far from work and I don’t take too long to get ready (unless I’m having a fat day, in which case I will put on a million outfits and hate/feel like a sausage in all of them) so I can hit snooze a few times. It’s still early. Lately the cats have been sleeping with us. This is a fairly new thing, before, they only liked sleeping with us when it was cold. We live in Florida, so that’s not a lot.

Moosh either sleeps on my feet or on my pillow, giving my head very little space. This is mostly ok with me. At any given point, Taco will be draped over me, stretched along my side, or also at my feet. Also mostly ok with me. It’s kind of odd that they sleep on my side because I am not a still sleeper. The boyfriend has complained myriad times about getting kneed, punched and elbowed (until we got a king, SO NICE!).

This is all besides the point. On mornings that I have to wake up to go to work, everyone is extra snuggly, making it much harder to get out of bed. Purring furballs vs. work — I love my job and all but nothing beats kitty and bed.

I’m pretty much a morning person anyway. But I would like to sleep in a LITTLE TINY BIT on the weekends. Not asking much. 9? Even 8?

NO.

The cats are transformed into monsters on weekend mornings, generally around the time I would wake up for work. They crawl in and out of the window, disturbing the drapes and letting in light, knocking things over loudly, stepping all over me and meowing.

I understand that cats are not capable of rational thinking and spiteful actions, but sometimes I wonder…