Ending my year with a whine.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH.

Today is a sad day. It’s the last day of football season. My fantasy season was over long ago, having had a miserable showing. Technically right now I’m playing for 9th place. Out of 12. Having come in 3rd last year, this is a bit of a downer. Tis life, right?

Except my Buccaneers, my REAL football team, started off with the best of playoff hopes and will finish out the season on a 6-game losing streak because there’s pretty much no way in hell they’re going to beat the Falcons today (I AM, however, wearing my lucky shirt…the lucky part has no real foundation in fact, I just happen to notice that sometimes we win when I wear it. Not scientific at all). I don’t have a “secondary” favorite team, where’s the loyalty in that?

Bucs game. One we lost. But sat in club seats! Fancy.

Bucs game. One we lost. But sat in club seats! Fancy.

Bucs or bust. So I’m bustin’. Damn you, Josh Freeman, and all you adderall-taking cornerbacks…I mean, you’re football players. What do you need adderall for? Learning the play books? I doubt your self-diagnosed ADD affects your football-playing abilities. You know better than that. Or maybe you don’t, that’s why you play football. Whatever.

Football players can be real assholes. Yeah, they get paid too much. So do a lot of people, though. Like garbage men. But they probably deserve it more. Then again, getting slammed to the ground by 400-pound men repeatedly doesn’t sound like a blast, either. Maybe they all need some cats.

Moosh Moosh basking.

Moosh Moosh basking.

I bet they would be much better people. Just not Michael Vick. He should be put in the pound himself. I can’t believe that jackass has a dog now. I hope it bites his hand off. No, then they would euthanize the dog. Ok, I hope a random dog bites his hand off and runs off into the sunset.

Yes, I’m rambling. But in addition to my sad football day, it’s also “that time of the month” where perfectly normal women become whiny babies curled up in fetal positions contemplating hysterectomies. So that’s where I’m at. I think it’s time to start drinking.

FOLLOW-UP: The Bucs WON. And they actually looked GOOD. I’m pleased. Not like it got us into the playoffs or anything, but at the very least it gives me hope for next season. Maybe not quite hope, but a less bitter taste in my mouth to take with me into the offseason. Super Bowl XVIII, here we come!

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4 comments

  1. Boomdeeadda

    I’m sure they wished all their fans adopted your attitude and optimism. Footballs not all that big here…they end up playing the last few games in snow most years. I went to a came once years ago, on a first date…he got pretty drunk..but not fun drunk….’annoying guy’ drunk….thus the end of my football fan years..LOL. Loved the picture of Moosh Moosh basking…looks completely adorable. 100% appaulled that Vic gets to own a dog, that’s a crime in itself…..dog running into the sunset with any one or both 😉 of his body parts would be justice.

    • MEOWhearthis

      Oh man, that is NOT a first date kinda thing to do. A baseball game maybe…even hockey…NOT football. Unless you have a suite or something. Then again, I’m thinking of here, where it is usually scorching and the back of your legs swim in their own sweat on the tiny plastic chairs, and where you hopefully do not have a large, sweaty drunk man (or woman) next to you encroaching on your personal space. And yeah, I never hear anything about the CFL, except that it might be the only place that wants Tim Tebow.

      I root for Vick to get smashed every single game. Happened a lot this year. Not enough.

  2. Oldcat

    My team is the Cincinnati Bengals, from where I grew up. In the old days the ‘second favorite’ team was more understandable since you never saw your team play if you moved out of state and only about five teams played on National TV.

    Back then I used to like the Cowboys some, but Jerry Jones firing Landry cured that. When I was in St Louis in the 80s I used to follow the Cardinals but them jumping ship for Arizona stopped that. I lived in Chicago and followed the Bears and still like them some.

    • MEOWhearthis

      Ugh. I hate Jerry Jones.

      My dad is from Chicago, Da Bears and Green Bay are his secondary teams…but he’s over football this year, mostly because of how much the players get paid.

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